Tag: sadness

The Grief In My Heart

kswemba

In the quiet times, when I least expect, it finds me.

It tugs and pulls, and climbs up to the surface – gasping to come out.

It’s grief – and its different for each of us…but it’s there.

This year has been hard for everyone. Some of us have lost someone we love. Some of us haven’t been able to hug those that are still here. And all of us have struggled at some point with isolation, routine, and trying to stay positive for those around us.

But it’s hard! And in those quiet moments when I sit in silence, an unexpected companion shows up. And I let myself FEEL all that I’ve worked so hard to ignore this past year. And with a deep exhale, I cry. Because life is so different. But it’s OKAY to cry – to mourn how things were, what I miss, and what I’ve lost. I’m writing all of this to let everyone know it’s okay to cry. To let yourselves feel isn’t being weak – it’s being in tune with your emotions. It’s letting out what’s been hiding for a while. And maybe once it’s out, you can take a cleansing breath, and begin the day again. I hope that you can.

The Phone Booth in Mr. Hirosta’s Garden by: Heather Smith and Rachel Wada

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Themes: grief, loss, love, healing

Publication: 2019

Age group: it’s a picture book but I feel it could work for grade school aged kids because of the topic

This is a beautiful story based on real life events. The story follows Maiko, a young boy, and his neighbor, Mr. Hirota. One day, a tsunami washes away the loved ones in Maiko’s village. The entire community is shadowed in sadness. Wanting to talk to his daughter again, Mr. Hirota builds a telephone booth and places an unconnected phone inside. He sits in the phone booth and talks to his daughter, hoping his words are carried to her by the wind. Soon, others visit the booth to talk to their loved ones. Eventually, Maiko talks to his father and begins the process of grieving and healing.

This story touches my heart. I think it’s a great example of how a void is created when we lose people we love. Mr. Hirota’s phone booth allows the villagers to stay connected to those they’ve lost. It doesn’t quickly solve the pain and sadness the villagers feel, but gives them an opportunity to start the healing process. When Maiko does talk to his dad, he tells him he misses him. I think this can show children that it’s okay to say you miss the person you’ve lost.

I recommend this read and hope you’ll give it a chance.

How to take bad news

kswemba

Sometimes we’re told something that’s bad and unexpected. I realize that I go into “containment” nurse mode, which basically means I instantly figure out how bad the “bad” is and see the upside. I dive into research and figure out the cause if it’s medical, what’s being done, what can be done, and focus on that instead of the feeling. Why? Because the feeling is hard to deal with.

Reality doesn’t set in til later, and that’s when the tearful emotion of sadness begins. No longer thinking, but feeling the emotions that I initially didn’t give a chance to surface. Letting ourselves feel is hard! But it’s also part of being human. Sometimes having a good cry can get us more in touch with our feelings. The positive side is now that the floodgate of emotion is open, maybe we can tap into the loving, caring side more. We can offer support to others, or extend an offer to help out whatever way we can.

Have you ever been told bad news about someone? How did you take it?

I wish everyone well!

Persevere

kswemba
Find the beauty, however small or hidden

Life can be so hard sometimes. It can emotionally take a toll on us.

Today I was hit with some disappointing news. I got to be honest, I can take things a little too emotionally, so I definitely cried today. BUT……I am going to make the choice to persevere. Yes, I am upset, and hurt. Did things go how I wanted them to? No. Am I going to stop trying because of a set back? No. A set back is a detour, a pause, an opportunity in disguise urging us to put in more work to succeed.

That’s what I’m going to do. In life, we can’t just quit because things didn’t work the first time. I definitely do not want to be a person who just quits when things get tough. I can almost here the theme song to Rocky right now, pumping me up, cheering me on. Yes, it’s not easy to get past a disappointing life event. But what’s the alternative? Quit, not try again? I don’t want to be that person. I will persevere.