Today, I started crying

This is the first time I’ve posted anything since February. COVID hit, changed all of our lives, and I just couldn’t bring myself to talk here. I held my cards to my chest, steeled my core and kept a schedule for my kids to keep life for them as normal as possible.

I did tear up a few times but tried to keep it together. I needed to have it together so I could be their teacher everyday, their mom, their friend, their opponent at cards (which they seriously beat me at UNO all the time) and their buddy. With all of this, I had to block out the outside world. Anytime I would read the news, I was reminded how fortunate we’ve been that our family was healthy and safe. COVID has brought such devastation to so many lives and I can’t even truly grasp it’s horrible actions.


My 7 year old have their last virtual meeting with their class. Their wonderful teacher put together a slide show that played Jason Mraz “Have it All” in the background and I cried. I cried because of the lyrics, because of the fact that my kids didn’t get to have class in school with their friends and their teachers. I cried that this virus has ROBBED so many of graduations, proms, final seasons of sports. I can’t imagine not having the last few months of my senior year be at school. Heartbreaking. I cried for those who have lost their lives, for families that have been torn apart. I cried for those who died without family around them, and for the families who haven’t been able to have a proper burial.


All of this does not sit well with me. Now that I am letting myself feel, the tears come more freely. How do we pick up? Start over or start again? How do we heal? One day at a time. It’s hard to move past something that still has a firm grasp on our lives. I can only pray for the medical profession, the scientists, doctors nurses and all hospital staff. May they develop a vaccine, get the care THEY need and deserve.

I am thinking of everyone today. And hope, hope that healing is just around the corner.

Pumpkin Patch Magic

Today my son and I went with his school on a field trip to the pumpkin patch. The day was beautiful! The sun shone through sparse clouds, leaves rustled under our feet, and the air was filled with giggles and laughter of children. The kids fed a few farm animals and we headed out on a hayride. I’m amazed at how I forget how great it is just to be surrounded by nature. The morning was a tough one to say the least. Being outside, in the crisp fall air, seemed to be just the cure I needed.

After the hayride, everyone picked a pumpkin and two gourds. I gotta say, my son picked out some pretty awesome gourds! Out of all the ones there, he managed to find the only swan gourd….way to go bud.

On days where things seem less than sunny in your world, try stepping outside for a minute and take in a little nature. It definitely worked for me today. Well that, and a fun trip to a pumpkin patch as seen through the eyes of a child.

Feel Love

Today I dropped my son off for afternoon school, then went to swing by my daughter’s school to see how she was feeling. She’s on an antibiotic for an ear infection, and the nurse said I could bring in Motrin for her if she needed it. I got there right at lunch and went over to my daughter. She knocked me over with how surprised, happy, delighted, ELATED she was to see me! There was so much LOVE coming from her! Hugs and cuddling close to me while she ate….it was so nice!

Our world has been stuck in a rut of not listening, bad behavior and time outs that it was so nice to feel love. To GIVE love and have that great feeling of being a parent. It’s not always like that is it? But when it is, GRAB onto it, cherish it, and be in the moment as much as possible. Your kids do love you! We can just get caught in the cycle of being a disciplinarian that we forget that these little people are our loves.

If you’re feeling stuck, try shaking up your routine. Maybe take a spontaneous adventure, a walk in the park, a night car ride with glow sticks (my kids favorite), movie night with popcorn or anything you can think of that will bring back some plain love and fun into your family. Days can get hard, but we ALL need to feel love.

Apprehension and the Unknown

As parents, we try to make the best decisions for our family. We research, ask around, and follow our instincts that tell us what will work best. But, we don’t always know how it will work out. I’m in one of those positions today. My son is attending his second year of preschool, but because of our family’s schedule, he’ll be in the afternoon class. As I sit here I’m wondering if this was the best choice. Will he have the energy he needs? Will he meet new friends, since everyone else stayed in the morning classes? I know I’m worrying unnecessarily, but it’s what I do!

Life is like that. Nothing is certain or comes with directions when raising kids. Yes, there are valuable books out there, but nothing that pertains to your exact situation, or the personality of your child. We just need to trust ourselves that we’re doing our best, and the best for our children. So to all of those parents who are wondering and worrying, I’m right there with you. What are you worried about?

Teach Our Kids With Love and Kindness

“Childhood is not a race to see how quickly a child can read, write and count. It is a small window of time to learn and develop at a pace that is right for each individual child” Magda Gerber

Last night I went to my son’s curriculum night for preschool. I LOVE his preschool. The teachers believe in teaching at age appropriate levels, through play, and showing the children that learning is fun. After all, we want to foster their love for knowledge and set them on a great path for learning.

If we push too hard or turn learning into a forced task, we could destroy their love for learning. Instead, it would turn into an undesirable chore that they will look at with resentment. At my son’s school, they have created a wonderful learning environment where they combine fun with learning. The lessons are gently integrated into playful activities and the kids don’t see school as something scary or hard, or that they aren’t good at. They are ENCOURAGED, supported, and even loved. What a wonderful way to start their learning journey.

Healthy School Routine

Summer is a great time of year where kids can spend hours outside running free, playing and being little. We spend our summers at the pool, playing in the backyard, eating ice cream and going on bike rides. Our schedules are a little less packed, which gives some breathing room for extra time outside and later bedtimes which hopefully leads to sleeping in, but not always though.

Now, however, we’re back in school and my mind has switched gears to having a more set schedule. I strongly believe that our family needs routine and functions best when everybody knows what is expected of them. My children are in first grade and preschool, and I think it’s good to show them the balance of school work and play. For example, if my first grader comes home with a project, we need to get that done first before heading outside or to her sport’s practice. This seems like an easy and obvious thing, but for kids, all they want to do is play. If I make it a routine where we come home and get our necessary things done, they can feel a sense of accomplishment and then enjoy the reward of playing. I have a master degree in psychiatric nursing, and I can say that helping kids develop responsibility is a positive thing, as long as it’s being done in a gentle and kind way. It’s not easy, but if you stick to the routine, when they get older they’ll already have good study habits which will only help them to succeed in the future.